I loved him. Sometimes I believed I loved him more than I loved myself. Despite his large ego, a person couldn’t do anything but respect him because his presence spoke power. When I was with him I felt secure, I felt safe, and most importantly I felt loved. If I never knew someone could wear a disguise... I learned with him. Giving your heart to someone only to realize they will never give you theirs is a hard thing to accept. And it’s even harder taking your heart back. For years I tried but honestly I know there is still a part of me with him. Wherever he is and with whomever he is with. The sad part about this process is the person is fully aware of the way you feel and will sometimes take advantage of it. I rode the same emotional rollercoaster over and over hoping for what? Because it always turned out to be the same twist, turns, hills, headaches, and heartaches. I never understood the purpose of someone dealing with someone they could never truly love. What is the purpose of wasting time?
I had a friend ask me the other day if it was better to be with someone who loves you more than you love them. My answer was yes, but we both knew it simply isn’t that easy. It’s rare that we encounter a situation where the love is mutual. So, most people find themselves unhappy with their relationships either because they’re the ones loving the most or simply can’t love at all. But it’s either you do or don't… it’s no between. I truly believe loving a person happens the moment you meet them. However, as time progresses learning a person can either enhance or dissolve that feeling. I honestly don’t think the whole “learn to love someone” can happen. I’ve tried it… it doesn’t work. Tank said it best… “I can’t make you love me”….. do you feel he was right or wrong. Critiques anyone?
Is it possible to learn to love someone? Possibly...but the chances are highly unlikely. If that feeling isn't there, I think it's hard to force it. Now, true enough people feel obligated to love someone when they get caught up in "a situation" like having a child. At that point you may not really be in love, but you may force yourself to feel something just to have a family. Needless to say, that may not be true love. It does work for some people, but deep down inside they may not be truly happy. There is nothing like meeting someone, connecting with them, and falling head over heals in love. When you look into their eyes there is a burning passion and desire to be with them forever. Although nowadays that seems pretty far fetched. Almost a picturesque fairytale it seems. As unrealistic as that may sound, I still have hope that one day it will happen that way for me. Hell, it doesn't hurt to dream. Love is such a pure emotion, and it deserves to come from a pure place with genuine intent. Love is, and must always be an organic emotion that should remain untainted by all forces that oppose it. Call me a hopeless romantic, but that's just they way I see it.
ReplyDeleteLove at first sight is based off emotions and not reality,just because you see someone and they have a certain look or "swag" you like and good convo doesnt mean that a month from now you wont see that they are full of shit. Through my experiences real love comes from growth and friendship, of course you see someone and you can be head over heels but thats not rational and thats the reason so many women miss out on good men because they go for what appears to be a diamond but its a CZ and the diamond in the rough gets looked over.With everyone wanting this instant gratification and looking for this image thats portrayed by the media with videos ,tv shows and the music lyrics of today most women have this unrealistic view of what a real man is and the love they claim they want they probably will never have because they are looking to be swept of their feet by this certain image instead of getting to know a person first,thats why these days most people think fake is real and whats real they cant understand so they turn away from that with such words as weird,crazy,or on some other shit but hopefully as you grow you will learn to look for real qualities in a man and not need a man to make you feel secure because a real man wants to compliment his woman not make his woman.
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